Thursday, July 10, 2014

The Angel of Death

If you are an animal run away from me. Now! I am apparently channeling the angel of death for animal kind today, and I am not okay with this. I have now caused the deaths of two different animals today, and I am a bit disturbed by this.

It started with a squirrel. While driving to work this morning, a suicidal squirrel used my car to end his life. He darted out right in front of my back tire as I drove by him. A quick bump and a pop, and he was gone. A quick glance in the rear view mirror confirmed it. Mr. Squirrel had passed to the great beyond.

Now, I will admit that I was upset by this. I might have started to cry, but then reminded myself to get my crap together. It was a squirrel who wanted to die. Honestly, the suicidal part is what kept me from crying. It kept me from feeling like a murderer.

I then moved on from my morning trauma, and went about my day. Things took a turn for the worse about ten minutes ago. I went on my morning walk break when I noticed a little bird hopping around the parking lot.

As I got closer, I realized that he couldn't fly, and he was hopping in order to get away from me. At that point, I probably should have just walked away, but I wanted to help the poor thing if I could. I then followed him as hopped to the curb. Except he didn't hop to the curb, he hopped to the storm drain.

I thought he would hop on top of the storm drain and then hop over to a bush. We have feral cats near the office, so I was worried he would get eaten. Unfortunately, he hopped under the storm drain. At the point, I was getting ready to walk away since he obviously was not going to let me help him.

Next thing I know, he lets out a chirp as he hops backward and goes right down the drain. I let out a gasp of horror and waited to hear another chirp from the drain. Nothing. Another bird chirped at me from the trees, but nothing from the storm drain.

Once again, I brought about the death of another animal. So for the sake of humanity and animality (?), keep your animals away from me if you want them to live. I bring death to all animal kind right now. Pray for my animals at home since they have no choice but to deal with me today.

Sincerely,

Tanya (aka The Angel of Animal Death)